Dead but not really
by randomtvmusic
Summary: REUPLOAD: clove died in the games , but she came back to life and was taken to the capitol for 'silencing', now she escaped , she knows only one person could help her. katniss. had to reupload because the story kept not loading , its the same story as before . read and review please :
1. Chapter 1

Dead but not really

Chapter 1

Clove pov

The darkness was painful, I know that doesn't make much sense, but it was , my eyes were throbbing and my head felt like the back was going to fall off, although I suppose that's what it will feel like if you've had it smashed repeatedly into a metal cone thing , im still amazed I wasn't killed , well I was , but not for long.

I can hear the people around me, talking about how they were gonna get rid of me , you see in the arena , when your heart stops , your dead , the cannon is sounded and they signal the hovercraft , but what they don't show are the 'fake deaths' times where people hearts have stopped , and started again, what they do then is they 'silence' them, to the world those tributes are already dead and if the capitol let them go free , well cant have people running around the districts showing a massive flaw in their games now could they? They couldn't even get their tributes killed properly, so they kill them, quickly and efficiently , they normally get one 'straggler' as they call them per game , and apparently that what me.

(A/N I know what your thinking 'clove got her necked snapped , no way she could have survived' , just humour me , in this thresh only knocked her into a weird half dead half unconscious state)

I know they are discussing how to end my life , and I know that decision will be reached soon , but I don't want to die here , im not even sure how long ive been out but I can still feel my tribute clothes so it may not be very long , I cracked open my eyes and squinted at the harsh light that invaded them , my eyes adjusted and it became clear that I was in a capitol hospital , no doubt that the victor of the games could be in this same place , or the games could still be on for all I know , I know its weird , but I did always have a soft spot for katniss , not enough to stop me trying to kill her , but a soft spot nonetheless , I hope she wins , or won , or whatever , loverboy didn't stand a chance and cato , please the boy was strong but he had the intelligent of a mushroom , he wouldn't last much longer without me telling him what to do.

I tried moving my arms , they were weak but they moved which was good , I was about to test my legs when the curtain around my bed moved and I played dead but still kept my ears open to the noises around me , the doctors where chatting about me

"my my my , clove enderfeild , what a shame , a career as well ,poor girl , why couldn't she have just died with pride on the battlefield, oh how am I expected to explain this to her father , he will be so disappointed , they always are , but oh well these things do happen , nurse could you give me the scalpel , I need to remove the tracker"

The doctors tone was monotone and neutral, lacking a slight bit of sympathy, I felt the small incision and the pinch of the tracker being removed,

"right , I think we will just have to go for the injection this time , poor girl , she could have won"

I knew this was my only time to strike, I couldn't die here , I wanted to live ,I wanted to see her again – wait what?- im a career , and the first thing they teach you when you walk through the academy gates for the first time as a child ,is to survive not matter what the cost, I cracked open my eye open and grabbed at the doctors wrist , I threw my arm out and sent him crashing to the floor , the needle going god knows where in the other direction , the nurses all around me gasped and one even shrieked , my survival instincts kicked in , fight or flight , and just this once I picked flight, discovering my legs still work I swung them off the table and made a clumsy sprint for the elevator , at this point the doctor had gotten up of the floor and was screaming for security as the elevator doors slide shut and began to head down to the ground floor and sure enough when they opened there was a small of army of peacekeepers where running toward me , I sprinted toward the exit and just kept running , I had never been to the capitol before so I had no idea where I was going , I just had to get away , after a while I stopped and quickly thought of a plan , and pt it into action , first I got some clothes and food , the people of the capitol really were blind idiots , they didn't even notice someone taking something directly under their noses, I also heard through the town that katniss had won the games ,I did a slient victory cheer for the girl , loverboy also won , which made no sense to me at all but hey what am I supposed to do about it , I apparently came fifth , I 'died' after that foxfaced girl and before thresh , supposed cato did avenge me after all , he came 3rd I heard or second , seeing as there were 2 victors , but whatever.

Katniss and loverboy where getting ready for the victors tour train around all the separate districts set to leave in a few hours , but the victor, or victors in this case , should already be on the train preparing , I saw this as my chance to get her , I mean katniss , so ive always had a slight crush on the girl on fire , shes the only girl who ever put up a fight with me , I like that , I hate pushovers , I was never gonna act on this crush , but seeing as everyone thinks im dead I figure why not give it a shot. I raced towards the train station and I find the right train , seeing as it has 'victors tour train' n the side in big gold letters , I broke in through the back carriage and found it to be full of furniture , a storage cart , and apparently the only storage cart on the whole train , I hunkered down into a crouch in case anybody came through , I found a couch and lay down , having an exhausting morning sleep quickly overcame me.

Katniss

After the games and the crowing everything was a blur, the interviews f my victory and the fake romance with peeta. It just wasn't there for me , he was too much of a pushover , I need somebody who will argue with me , but still be sweet to me like…clove kind of , in a weird way , doesn't even matter that she was a girl , love is about the person , not the gender in my opinion. It's a shame she died , she was fierce , I respected that about her , I wonder what they did for their dead in district 2 , probably treated them like failures , I cringed slightly , poor clove , she was just a kid , only 15 , a trained killer yes , but still just a kid , I could see it in her eyes when we were fighting , she didn't want to be doing this , but she was scared like the rest of us, and people do crazy stuff when there scared , it had to be hard for her .

Me and peeta were sat around the dinner table in the victors train , peeta was blabbing on about how our parents would be so proud of us and how we will never have to worry about money again. It was giving me a headache.

"peeta" he immediately silenced , see. Pushover.

"im gonna call it a night , ill see you in the morning" I gt up and turned to leave , hearing a small goodnight from peeta , I didn't go to my room however , I decided t check out the end carriage , ive been told it's a storage cart , but im a curious individual and they should be deserted, reached the end cart and saw it was full of furniture , but what caught my eyes was a couch that was apparently moving on its own , I know the capitol creates weird stuff , but moving furniture , really? I decided to check it out, I moved clser and saw someone asleep on the couch with their back turned to me , I was about to move back out fo the car when they turned to me and I gt to the biggest shock of my life.

"clove?"


	2. Chapter 2

Clove

At the sound of my name I jumped into attack mode ready to defend my life , but all I found was a horror struck katniss , understandable ,seeing as the last time she saw me I was dead

"k-katniss?" I said in a calm voice, hoping not to scare her any more than she already was

"c-c-clove?" she whispered "b-b-but your d-dead, you dead thresh killed you!"

"Yeah I thought that to but katn-"

"I'm crazy, I've gone crazy, the games finally got to me and I've gone mad" she started pacing now, a hand on her forehead

"Katniss you haven't gone mad, just sit down and I'll explain everything"

She looked at me and nodded, moving to sit on the couch; I sat next to her and took a breath

"katniss , in the games when thresh smashed my head , I was knocked unconscious and my heart stopped, but then at some point it started again, I woke up in a hospital where the doctor tried to kill me again but I escaped and I just knew that I had to find you"

"m-me, why?"

"Because I knew you would help me" I say in the most sincere voice I can muster, I really need her help

"So let me get this straight, you were killed in the games, but you came back to life?"

"As ridiculous as it sounds, yes"

"So you're like a zombie? You aren't going to eat me are you?"

I laughed "no I'm not a zombie, look I even have a heartbeat"

I grabbed her hand and placed it on my chest, just over my heart, her breath hitched as we made contact, my heartbeat speeding up and my palms beginning to sweat, she leaned in closer to my face

"So you do, I guess you're not a zombie then" she whispered, getting ever closer to my lips

I leaned in as well and I watched her eyelids flutter closed , I was about to close the distance when the door burst open and I could hear lover boys loud steps as he made his way through the carriage

"Katniss! Katniss!" his annoying cries rang around the room , I immediately dropped to the floor and crawled behind the couch , as katniss straightened her outfit and pretended to look like she hadn't been almost caught kissing a would be should be dead person

"Katniss! There you are , I went to check on you and you weren't In your room , I got so worried about you , what are you doing back here anyway , do you know how many dangerous things there are here and-"

"Peeta! I'm fine , I was just curious that's all , but now I am going to bed , I just have to fine my earring , your voice scared me and I dropped it , I'll find it then I'll go to bed, so goodnight peeta!" Katniss nearly yelled at the boy, from my position behind the couch I could see him cower like a scared puppy, it was laughable, he nodded quickly, said a small goodnight and sped out of the room, I waited for a few more moments until I re-emerged from behind the couch, I laughed at everything but was quickly silenced by the look she gave me

"You have 10 seconds to explain to me, what exactly I'm supposed to do with you, because I've just had to yell at the boy I'm supposed to be in the love with and he's going to have questions and how exactly am I supposed to answer them?"

"i-I don't know what I expected you to do , and I don't know what you're supposed to tell him katniss , but one thing I did know is that I liked you from the first moment I saw you , I tried to make it go away , fighting the urges to talk to you , touch you , hold you , and in the arena when we were fighting , it took all my strength not to kiss you , but you don't understand the regret I felt when thresh grabbed me , I thought I would never see you again , I called for Cato because I knew he would find thresh and kill him , taking out a major competitor for you and I knew that you would be smart enough to kill Cato , I just wanted to make sure you were safe as you could be before I died , and I hope I did a good enough job , I just really thought you could help me now , but if you can't I understand , I'll find a train to somewhere , maybe district 7 , I heard they always take in immigrants , so I guess that's it , I don't have anything else to say" I finished my speech , draining my emotions into every word , silence fell over the already silent carriage , I took the silence as my que to leave , so I turned and headed toward the back hatch to the room.

"clove wait!" she grabbed my arm and turned me towards her , her face mere inches away from mine , I just couldn't take it anymore , I leant in and connected our lips in the most passionate kiss I could muster , she returned after a second and wound her hands into my hair , mine went to her waist and we just stood there kissing until the need for air became apparent , we broke apart with gasps , I rested my forehead on hers and closed my eyes , just wanting to savour this moment for just a little longer , I opened my eyes and saw katniss staring at me intently

"I-i-I like you to clove, but what do we do? The whole world thinks you're dead, and I'm supposed to be in love with peeta" she whispered to me, tears forming in her eyes

"Hey shhh, let me handle this babe, just don't cry please, I hate when your sad" I said brushing the tears from under her eyes, I would figure something out

"O-ok, but I can't have you staying here in this cold storage car; you can stay with me tonight"

"Oh umm katniss I'm not sure if I'm ready for-"

"No! Not like that, at least not right now at least, I just meant sleeping, dirty minded"

"Oh right, well that a relief, cos I've never-"

"Oh I either don't worry"

An awkward silence washed over us, broken only when katniss yawned

"So bed?" I asked

"Yeah it's through here"

I followed her through the cars, it was late now so everyone had gone to bed, save for haymitch, who had drunk himself into unconsciousness on the couch, we tiptoed passed Effie's room, who was known to be a light sleeper, we made it to katniss' room and lay down for a second, then katniss got up and went to her drawers on the other side of the room, I eyed her curiously when she threw clothes me, they hit me in the face.

"Hey!"

"You can wear those to sleep, the pants may be a bit big on you, seeing as your so short" she teased, it's true, I hated my height

"Can we not tease about my height please?"

"Aww sweetheart I love your height, its perfect"

I hmmphed in response and took the clothes and walked to the bathroom, I changed quickly and walked back into the bedroom, katniss was already in bed, I suddenly got very nervous, I had never shared a bed with anyone, not even friends, I never had friends, as if sensing my discomfort, katniss looked up from the book she was reading

"Clove you ok?"

"Y-yeah I'm fine"

"Then come to bed, it's just sleeping, you don't have to be nervous, I won't try anything I promise"

"O-ok"

I walked over to the other side of the bed and got in, I lay stiff as a board, unsure how to move, katniss moved and touched my arm

"Relax clove, I promise nothing will happen" she kissed my cheek and I relaxed some, I turned towards her and looked deep in to her eyes, I kissed her and put my arm around her waist

"Goodnight babe" I whispered as I closed my eyes

"Goodnight"


	3. Chapter 3

Katniss

When I woke up clove was holding me, my head on her chest , even though she was shorted than me, it wasn't uncomfortable , it felt nice , different from the times peeta held me after I had a nightmare , he was always too big , the muscles on his arms always pressed into me and it just me feel like I was suffocating , with clove her muscles where less noticeable , I knew she had them but her arms where still sleek and thin , then I occurred to me that I hadn't had a nightmare , it was the first full night of sleep id had since before the games , I laughed in joy quietly , though apparently not as quietly as I thought as it woke clove up

"Hey" she mumbled, sleep still evident in her voice

"Hey" I whispered

"What were you laughing about, was I drooling?"

"No, it's just that this was the first night since the games where I haven't had a nightmare"

"Oh well that great, glad to be of service"

She leant down a kissed me lightly, in that moment, I was content with everything

"Hey" she whispered to me when I opened my eyes

"Hi"

I just wanted to lie there for a few more minutes , but we were interrupted by a knock on the door , as if she had been planning for this exact scenario , clove rolled out of my arms and onto the floor , then rolled under my bed , completely out of view , chuckling slightly I got up to open the door

"Good morning katniss!" peeta nearly shouted in my face, god the boy tries, he really does, but he just doesn't get it does he?

"Morning peeta, so are we at district 1 yet?"

"Not yet, we had some kind of problem last night, so we had to stop the train for a while, we should arrive at district 1 early tomorrow morning, so how do you want to spend our free day?"

"oh umm , peeta I'm just gonna go back to bed , with the nightmares I've lost a lot of sleep , so I think I'll just catch up , but you go find something to do , I'll see you at lunch maybe"

"Oh right ok katniss, you still have nightmares? Do you want me to stay with you?"

This boy does not give up!

"no that's ok peeta , I'm pretty tired so I think I'll be ok besides I'm having some…woman problems and it gets pretty bad , so it's not a good idea"

I could see his face visibly turn red at the mention of woman problems, but I wasn't exactly lying, clove is a woman, and not being able to lie in bed with her right now was a problem

"Ah right, well ill just …I'm gonna … see you at lunch katniss"

He nearly ran from the door and out to the main area, I shut the door and quickly turned back around, clove was sat on my bed, one of her knives hanging weightlessly from her fingers, like she was going to throw it

"Jesus Christ, I thought he would never leave" she put her knife down and walked over to me "woman problems? Really?"

"Hey it's a sure fire way to get rid of guys"

"Noted, now I think we could be doing better things than this, like cuddling and or making out?"

"don't need to tell me twice" she leant in a kissed me ,hard, I responded instantly , her tongue begged entrance which I would gladly give ,my arms went around her neck , even though I'm taller than her , they just seemed to fit there , hers fell the my waist and we just stood there , until she pulled me towards her as she stepped backward , she fell backward onto the bed and I followed ,silently climbing on top of her , she pulled away with a breath , and smiled at me , I was in a slight daze , she is a really good kisser.

"You ok?" she asked trying to look in my eyes

"You're…really good at that"

She laughed lightly, I rolled off of her and lay down next to her, she turned to me at looked in my eyes

"Hey".

I laughed "you said that already"

"I did? Oh well"

"You're so weird"

"Yep, so how do you plan on spending your free day?"

"Lying here, with you"

"Sounds good to me"

We lay there in silence for a good 5 minutes, just looking at each other, taking in each other's appearances, until I had to ask the question that had been pressing on my mind

"Clove, what are you going to do? Everyone thinks you're dead, no doubt the capitol wants you dead, and you can't hide in here forever"

She sighed and sat up "I know, but I have a plan"

I sat up "which is?"

"Clove enderfeild is dead, but a new girl will rise from her ashes"

"I don't understand"

"I'm going to change my identity, become somebody else, that way ill avoid detection"

"Yeah, but how? the capitol has everybody on record , district 12 just randomly having a new person not on record could get us all killed"

"Which is why the capitol will never know where I am, and if I stay hidden with you then they will never find me"

"You'd be willing to hide for the rest of your life?"

"If it means being with you, id live in a cave"

"The victors village is empty mostly, and the houses are always too big for just one person, so I don't think cave dwelling will be necessary "

"And I won't be hiding forever, you know the capitol, they will lose interest in finding me after a while, then it will only be staying hidden whenever they visit"

"makes sense , but I'm still worried , what if they find you , they will kill you without a second thought , and I don't think I could live without you now , it would just be too hard"

"Well good thing I don't plan on going anywhere" she wrapped me in a hug and we just sat there, eventually I fell asleep I guess, because when I woke up, I was laying in my bed and clove was sat on a chair by the window

"you were asleep for about 2 hours , we started moving about an hour and a half ago , we should be at district 1 in about a half hour , I had a shower and read a book , it's a little after noon"

She answered every question I could think of, and I didn't even ask them yet, seeing as it was about lunch time I decided to get some food

"You want some food?"

"Um sure, whatever you can grab is fine"

"Well alright then"

I walked out of the door and down the hall to the dining area, peeta; haymitch and Effie were sat around the table talking about something I really didn't care about

"Oh good afternoon miss everdeen, I trust you are well rested" Effie's unnaturally high voice went through me like a knife

"Yea I'm fine Effie, but I'm not feeling great, so I'm just gonna take some food back to my room if that's ok"

"its fine sweetheart, I'll have an avox send some food, you just go back to bed, you do look pale" haymitch said and clicked his fingers, an avox appeared out of nowhere and began to create a plate for me, I walked back to my room and lay down, clove was about to ask me what was wrong when there came a knock at the door, she immediately rolled onto the floor and under my bed again.

"Come in" I called, trying to act slightly weak and sick

"Hey katniss, I got your food off the avox, thought I'd bring it to you" peeta said walking in holding a tray with some food and drink on it

"Thanks peeta"

"So how are you feeling?" he sat down at the edge of my bed, no doubt mere inches away from clove, he patted my blanket covered leg

"I'll be ok, I think it's just one of those 24 hour things, but I don't want to get you sick, so staying in here is probably not the best idea, we can't have two sick victors"

"It's ok; I don't mind getting sick if it means I get to spend some time with you"

"Oh peeta, that's sweet, but really you shouldn't stay, Effie will throw a fit"

"Who cares about eff-ow!" he jumped off my bed and grabbed his ankle, there was a gash in it, about 2 inches in an upward direction, blood dripped onto the carpet as he hopped around

"Peeta are you ok! Go get someone to patch that up" I ushered him out of my room , with him mumbling about what he cut his leg on , I shut the door behind me and clove climbed out from under my bed , chuckling and still holding the knife with peeta blood on the end

"Why did you cut him?" I asked, slightly annoyed

"He wouldn't leave, he tries too hard for you, you know"

"Oh and coming back to life for me, that's ok?"

"Of course" she joked, we fell into a comfortable silence eating the food that peeta had brought, she was starved so she wolfed down her half, I watched her with strange fascination

"What?" she asked

"Nothing, it's just, I think I might lo-"

"Hey katniss I was just coming to check on yo-OH MY GOD CLOVE!"

She dived under the bed but it was no use, peeta had burst in and seen her clear as day.

How was I going to explain this one?


	4. Chapter 4

Clove

I dove under the bed at the shout, knowing that other would follow after peeta and sure enough I heard the footsteps of what I believe were haymitch, Effie and probably a peacekeeper or two

"What is going on in here?" I heard Effie cry

"Yea peeta, you just came in here and started screaming, it's like you were dreaming or hallucinating or something" katniss was trying to convince the others that whatever peeta said was a lie.

Smart girl.

"I saw clove! She was sat right behind katniss and- and they were talking, and eating and laughing"

"peeta , I think I would know is I had a psychopath like clove sat with me , in fact , I think I'd be dead" ouch , that stung , but I know she doesn't mean it

"No, I'm not lying, she was sat right there! "I could see his feet move towards katniss, probably gesturing to the space i used to be like a madman

"peeta , why don't you go lie down for a while , unless you want to scan my room for Cato or marvel , oh watch out I think glimmer is in the closet!" katniss was joking , or making fun of him , it's hard to tell sometimes , all I heard was him huffing a bit more about how I was 'right there' and 'why doesn't anyone believe him' eventually he walked out of the door , the peacekeepers , seeing no threat , left as well , haymitch stumbled off , mumbling about kids interrupting his drinking , and Effie just reminded katniss that they were about 20 minutes outside district 1 then she left as well , I waited for a few more seconds before I came out from under the bed

"That was too close for my liking" she said

"Yea no kidding we have to be more careful, now go, and spend time outside of this room, so they at least think your normal"

"alright , I'll be back later I guess " she kissed me quickly and left the room , I decided to take a nap on the bed , making sure to lock the door first , I settled under the covers , facing the door just in case somebody knocked

"I know you're in there" I heard a male voice say, the slight slur in his words indicated that it was haymitch

"I know you're in there" he continued"I don't know how you got in there, I'm not even sure how your alive, but hurt katniss and I will kill you"

His protectiveness over katniss made my heart hurt , I had never known such love and care for a person , they weren't even related and not even my own father would ever admit he loved me , or cared for me ,or try to protect me, he would throw me to the dogs if it meant protecting himself

"I won't hurt her" I whispered , I don't think he heard me , I hope he didn't hear me , I heard some kind of jingling noise, which I soon realised was haymitch picking the lock to katniss' room

I dove under the bed as he got the door open

"Well if you're just going to hide under the bed it's a wonder we didn't find you sooner!" he walked behind the bed and pulled me out by my feet

"Please, don't tell anyone I'm here! They will alert the capitol and then they'll kill me and…and…and I don't want to die!" my begging had turned to crying as I let all my pent up emotion out , I was crying for my family , for the tributes I'd killed , for the kids at the academy training to be like me ,I cried for myself , I'd seen death and it wasn't a nice experience and I didn't want to go back , but mostly I cried for katniss , she was risking so much just to be with me and it killed me every day ,somewhere in my crying fit haymitch had wrapped me in a hug and was whispering that he wouldn't tell and that it was ok and that he understood , I just cried and cried until I felt haymitch let me go and a new pair of arms replaced his , the sweet smell of honey and elderflower shampoo immediately told me it was katniss and a hugged her tightly , crying about how I was sorry , she kissed my head and moved her fingers under my chin , making me look at her

"What are you sorry for?"

"I've put you through so much, the lying, the hiding, everything, I'm just ….so sorry" I was still crying, tears streaming down my face, unable to stop them

"you have no reason to be sorry , these last few days have been the best of my life ,never , never apologise for that , I love you clove , and that will never change"

"I...i love you too katniss"

"Well this is touching moment, but I think I'll be going now" haymitch said, to be honest, I'd forgotten he was there, but he was now inching towards the door

"Haymitch wait!" katniss called out, she ran to him and wrapped her arms around him, he returned the hug the way a father would hug his daughter

"Thank you, for helping her, and please, please don't tell, his life depends on it, and mine to, because I can't live without her"

"Don't worry sweetheart, I won't say a word, but you will have to figure something out for when we get off this train"

"We will don't worry"

Haymitch was just out of the door when he turned again

"But you do realise that you still have to pretend to be in love with peeta right?"

"Yea, but I can play convincing" katniss joked

"We'll see" and then he was gone

"katniss look, district 1" I pointed out of the window where I saw the shiny city, I'd been there a few times before, me and glimmer where friends before the games, we had to write to each other for some stupid school pen pal project and we struck up a friendship, everything was very regulated there and I didn't like it much

"oh yeah , great now I have to go stand in front of a crowd , holding peeta's hand and proclaiming that we are in love , gag me with a spoon!"

I laughed and put my arm around her waist "aww babe, it will all be over soon, I wonder if the capitol has even tried looking for me, I haven't heard any news"

"No maybe they're just thinking out of sight, out of mind, maybe your freedom will come without the name change"

"Well here's hoping"

We pulled into the station and a dropped to the floor, out of the way of the window

"ShowTime beautiful" I smiled, she leaned down and kissed me quickly, then walked out of the door, I ventured out of the room, figuring that everyone was outside with katniss and peeta, but low and behold haymitch was sat in a chair looking out of the window

"It's ok, you can stay, there's no one else on the train, so you will be safe" haymitch said, not taking his eyes off the window

"O...k"

"So was it difficult, killing all those people?"

The question caught me off guard

"Umm no not really, as a career we are trained not to feel emotion in anything we do, we don't even see our family, except for special occasions, and to watch the games, we are taught from a very early age that emotion is the things that will get you killed"

"I hate your districts, they treat the games like a ceremony, like it's something that should be celebrated, they willing send their children to die, and it sickens me"

"believe me I didn't like it either , but to be fair I wasn't volunteered , I was chosen at random , like every other district , Cato volunteered , but I wanted to be strong and made my way to the stage before any other girl could volunteer, and it's a decision that ultimately got me killed"

"I have to ask, what happens to all the other careers that don't compete in the games"

"They become peacekeepers normally, some stay in the academy to train the next generation, and some just, live a free life"

"And what would you have done?"

"I would have probably become a trainer; I'm the best knife thrower in panem, so it would have been wise"

"And what will you do now?"

"I don't know, mooch of katniss for the rest of my life, god that sounds horrible, I couldn't do that to her, I'm hoping maybe one day, I can go home, maybe, but it doesn't seem likely"

"The capitol will forget about your little escape soon enough sweethearts, I mean, they forgot about amber"

"Amber?"

"yeah a girl in my games, district 9 If I remember correctly, hid the entire games, cut the tracker out of her arm and waited till the games were over and the barricade came down, then she escaped, they looked for her for a while but ultimately they forgot about her, last I heard she was living quite happily in district 5, got a family"

"I hope I can do that eventually, but no offence, I really don't want to live in district 12"

"Don't count your chickens before they hatched darling, now I think you may want to go back to katniss' room, the camera crews are coming back"

"Really? The visits over?"

"Yea kid, there only short visits, they why they can normally fit them all in in about a week and a half"

"right then, I'll see you later haymitch" I got up and walked back to katniss' room , I lay down on the bed and closed my eyes briefly ,when I opened my eyes , katniss was staring down at me

"How was your visit" I ask sitting up

"Dull, the place is so shiny I had to walk around with a hand shielding my eyes"

"And how was lover boy?"

"Annoying, he kissed me twice, only quickly and I didn't like it at all, he always tastes like bread"

"Well he is a baker"

"Yeah, but I prefer people who are a bit more…dangerous"

"Oh really?" I asked with a smirk, pulling her closer to me, she placed her arms around my neck and kissed me

"How long do we have before we reach two? "I asked between kisses

"About 3 hours"

"Door?"

"Locked it on my way in"

"Peeta?"

"Asleep"

"Effie"

"Flirting with the driver"

"Haymitch?"

"Passed out drunk"

"Right then"

I kissed her again and we slowly lay down with her on top of me, the kisses became more heated as hands began to wander, somehow katniss' hands ended up ender my shirt

"Babe if we don't stop now, I won't be able to" she panted, I thought about it for about a millisecond

"Then don't stop" I answered, pulling her shirt over her head

"Are you sure this is ok?" she answered, reaching to the lamp to turn it off

"Positive"


	5. Chapter 5

(A/N did you actually think I was going to write smut? Not my style I'm afraid)

Clove

We pulled into district 2 after a few hours, in which me and katniss had found a _great_ way to spend our time, the time and care and love shared between us in that time was simply the best experience of my life, I was well and truly in love with katniss everdeen, and she was in love with me too

Afterwards we just lay with each other , I was lightly tracing a faded scar in her forehead , the one I had given her , I'm not going to be that person anymore , no more unnecessary violence

"as much I would like to lay here with you for the rest of eternity , I'm afraid i can see district 2 out of the window , which means I have to get up and pretend to be peeta's girlfriend again" katniss said as she got up and got dressed, I slid out of bed as well , put on one of katniss' many robes and looked out at my district , the many statues that made up its boarder , in my district , we honoured our tributes, whether they won or not ,we had statues made of us , to forever protect our great district, the winners got bigger statues along with the whole pride and money stuff , but I could see the work beginning on statues of me and Cato , I could see what would become my feet , and they were apparently making Cato have a big sword , I could see the end of that being built, I hope they make me have my knives

"Is that you?" katniss said, coming up behind me and wrapping her arms around my waist

"Yeah, we make statues of our tributes, whether they win or not, to honour their sacrifice for the capitol"

"I didn't know that district two could be …loving, I thought your dead would be cast aside as failures"

"Don't judge a book by its cover babe, my district can be very brutal yes, but we still know that we have to honour our dead, we aren't soulless monsters you know"

"Yea I know that…now"

"Go be bread boy's girlfriend for a while"

"And what will you do?"

"I don't know, clean probably" I gestured to the room around me, which was a mess due to our …ahem _activities_ clothes everywhere, and the bed was a mess

"right well , umm have fun I guess" she kissed me and walked out of the room , I started picking up all of the clothes and putting them in the hamper , I guess an avox came to get the full hamper at some point , it doesn't matter if she saw us , it's like she could tell anyone could she?

As I was changing all the bedding on the bed I looked out of the room and saw district 2 , my home , in the distance I could see my house , memories I had suppressed rose to the surface , playing with my father when I was younger, before my mother died and he became cold , my brother ,teaching him how to fight as children before he went to the academy , my mother teaching me to throw knives in the backyard, I felt a tear slip down my face , I wiped it away and continued making the bed , but the memories kept coming , watching my mother get sicker and sicker , holding her hand as she died, the funeral, watching my naïve 12 year old brother volunteer for the games ,so depressed about mothers passing that he was just asking to be killed, watching him last 2 days before getting murdered by the district 1 male tribute, burying him next to mother ,deciding to move full time to the academy , my father not even saying goodbye to me as I left for the last time , waiting for somebody to say goodbye to before I left for the capitol , nobody came.

I came out of my daydream to find tears streaming down my face and arms wrapped around my waist from behind

"It's ok clove, I'm not sure what it is, but it's ok"

"D-d-did you see him?"

"Who?"

"My father, you have to meet all the important people, and he's basically a diplomat, so I'm a-a-assuming you had to meet him?"

"Yeah I met him, he is a very cold man, and he didn't mention you"

"He probably doesn't want the shame"

"He didn't even look at me; he kept looking at peeta, telling him he would make a fine academy trainer"

"With a build like his, he really would make a good strength trainer"

"When we finish this tour, he can move to district 8 and sew dresses for all I care"

"Maybe he will, he can do that delicate stuff "

"Yes he can, now what were you crying about?"

"Oh just…memories, so many bad ones attached to that place"

"Well how about we make some good ones attached to district 12 yeah?"

"Ok"

"Let's lay down for a while, I for one am exhausted, too much fake smiling for the cameras, how about you?"

"I could nap"

We lay together and slept for about an hour, katniss got up to get dinner, I lay around till she came back, a small plate of food in her hand

"Haymitch told me to take this to his room, but he whispered to give it to you"

"Oh well, my thanks to haymitch"

I ate in silence and watched the scenery fly past the window as we sped towards district 3 , we went to bed a little while after dinner , and when we woke up we were in district 3 , we had breakfast , with katniss sneaking me some food , then they had to go for a tour of district 3 , I busied myself with having a conversation with haymitch until they returned , when me and katniss would hide in her room , keeping ourselves busy of course , we carried on this routine till we reached district 6

"Hey, they've sent our posters looking for you" katniss said walking into our room holding a piece of paper

"Really?" I said grabbing it

"Yeah, but you can tell they didn't pay much attention to your appearance"

It's true , the picture didn't look much like me , wrong hair colour , wrong bone structure , hell they even called me clover for Christ sake!

"Yeah they are idiots" I said crumpling up the flyer and throwing it expertly into the bin

We carried on the routine, with each district change the flyers became more and scarce and distorted the further out we got, by district 11 there were no flyers at all

"Well only 1 stop left"

"Yep, are you ready to be out of this room?"

"Defiantly, but I'm not sure how the residents of 12 will take to me"

"The people of 12, they keep their heads down, if they connected you to the girl from the games, they wouldn't say anything to anybody, we are just quiet people"

"Ok, but still I'll try not to draw attention to myself"

"Might be a good idea at the start"

"I love you, have I told you that before?"

"Once or twice yea" she laughed as we pulled up to our final stop, district 12

Well, as I heard on one of my grandmothers old TV shows she watched when she was a kid

Geronimo


	6. Chapter 6

Katniss

We did our little tour of our home district, which really just meant having a conversation with the mayor while some people moved our stuff into our new houses, then we waved off the tour train and Effie who was headed back to the capitol, clove had ran out of the back of the train as we got off in the morning, haymitch gave her strict instructions to go to his house and wait for me there.

"So katniss, what are you doing later" peeta walked up to me and apparently thought that because we were on home turf he could turn on what he thought was his charm.

It wasn't working.

"Sleeping peeta, I'm exhausted"

"Oh well maybe I could…you know...join you?" the way he said it implied that he didn't want to just sleep, I slapped him for that

"What the hell peeta! Why do you think I would let you 'sleep' with me?"

"Because we are young, attractive and rich, why not celebrate it with some…closeness"

I slapped him again

"I am never going to sleep with you, I don't know what happened to the sweet baker's son that I was with in the games, but whoever the hell you are, and you're a pig!"

I stormed off, ignoring peeta's cries of 'katniss wait!" and smiling at the obvious sound of haymitch punching peeta, I stormed into haymitch's house, amazing to see it partially clean

"Clove!" I called out into the mass of bottles and old food

"Over here, I'm just cleaning"

"Yeah well good luck, once they sent a maid in here and she still hasn't come back"

"It was something to keep me busy, but now you are here, this place is hopeless" she walked out of the living room, hair slightly messy

"Come on"

I grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the house , we quickly made our way across the street , only slightly worried about people seeing clove , like I said , people of 12 are quiet people, we made it into my house and immediately clove ran upstairs , I waited for a second , before I heard her call for me from upstairs

"Hey katniss!"

"What?" I made my way upstairs; she was standing in the hall, between two bedrooms on either sides of the hall

"So I wanted to ask you if you wanted me to have my own room or are we sharing again? Cos its cool if you don't want to , I'll be fine , it's just I didn't want to pick one and then just have you say you don't want to share with me anymore , but its fi-"

I cut her off, kissing her hard; I pulled back and stared into her eyes

"of course we will share a room ,I want to share everything with you , I want to share a life with you ,your it for me , I love you more than I can ever say "

"I love you too katniss and nothing is ever going to change that"

"Good. Shall we unpack?"

"I have nothing to unpack"

"Right well then, ill unpack and you can just lay on the bed and look adorable"

"I'll try"

Clove

I sat on the bed while katniss unpacked, this house was nice enough, it looked like the regular houses in district 2, but I saw the houses in this district, this would be considered luxury, after katniss unpacked we went downstairs, of course the shelves were already full so we found some crackers nibbled on them as we snuggled up on the couch, flicking through the channels, finding nothing interesting, I was about to suggest a nap before clove beat me to an idea

"How about we show peeta that I'm here?"

"Why would we do that?"

"Because he's going to find out eventually, it would just be easier to let him know now than have him find out for himself"

"Suppose, but could we sleep first, I'm trying to sleep off a week and a half of train lag"

"Sure"

We went up to the bedroom, changed into some pyjamas and got under the covers katniss shuffled backward towards me, her back against my front, and my arm draped itself across her waist and soon soft snores could be heard from katniss, I smiled and quickly joined her in sleep

Katniss

We slept off our train lag and accidentally slept till 2 in the afternoon the following day

"Well that's a day wasted" clove said as she sat up and stretched

"Well I believe we needed it"

"Suppose we should go tell peeta"

"Why not, it's not like anyone will believe him if he tells"

"Well, no time to waste me suppose"

We got dressed and thought of a plan, I would go get peeta and clove would sit and wait. I walked over the peeta's house and knocked on the door

"Why katniss, what a pleasure" he slurred, the stench of alcohol penetrated my senses, peeta smelled like haymitch

"Peeta, have you been drinking?"

"A little, I'm enjoying the rich life katniss!" he raised his glass and drank again

"Whatever peeta, I just need you to come with me"

"Why?"

"There is something I need to show you"

"Well alrighty then!" he stumbled out of the door, something told me I would have to explain clove to him again once he'd sobered up

I followed him out and cut ahead of him when we reached my door, I opened it and he walked through, clove was sat on the couch patiently waiting, he walked in and stopped when he saw her, then he started laughing

"ka-katniss!" he laughed"come look, I'm soooo wasted, and I'm hallucinating! I- i- i- I can see c-clove again!"

"I'm not a hallucination peeta" clove replied

"She talks as well! Man what did I drink, furniture polish!"

"Peeta, if I was a hallucination, could I do this?"

And with that, she walked over to him, and punched him square in the jaw, he went down, hard, and didn't get up again

"Well at least this will give him time to sober up, what's on TV?"

We watched TV for about an hour before peeta groaned and sat on the ground

"h-hey katniss" he put a hand on his head "i had the weirdest dream , c-clove was in your house , sat on that couch" he gestured over to clove then immediately stood up and backed away

"K-katniss, why is clove, the district 2 career tribute who tried to _kill you_ and was killed by thresh, sitting on your couch?"

"She's not dead, she came back"

"For her" clove said, walking up behind me

"S-so when I saw her on the train, It was really her?" he was pointing now, obviously s very confused, it was kind of funny

"Yea I was, it just katniss is a really good liar"

"b-but why is she still here! Call the peacekeepers! She's dangerous katniss!" he grabbed my hand in an attempt to pull me away

"She's not peeta! She was a career, but now she's changed" I pulled my hand away

"I'm in love with her!" clove shouted, trying to get me and peeta to stop arguing

"You- your what?" peeta gawped

"I'm in love with her peeta, I would never hurt her, yea I was a bad person, but I've changed, I can't imagine life without her, I want to be with her for the rest of my life, and I will do anything to prove that to you"

There was a long silence, peeta sighed and put a hand through his hair

"Just answer me this, will you love her, take care of her, and protect her?"

"Till my last dying breath, I would die for her peeta "

"Well, I guess there is no changing your mind katniss?"

"None, I love her as much as she loves me" I put my arm around her shoulders as hers went around my waist

"Well I guess I accept defeat then, and I assume that you will still want the peeta katniss love story to continue for the capitol?"

"If you don't mind peeta?" I walked over to him and hugged him "thank you for understanding"

"It's ok katniss, I love you, and I know you love me, just not in the same way, and that's fine by me, and type of love I can get from you is enough"

"Aww peeta, you're going to make some girl very happy someday, I love you peeta, your like my family"

"Well then I'll be off I guess, oh and clove I have a question, what's the academy like in district 2?"

"Best in panem why?"

"I've been offered a job there, strength trainer, muscle building"

"I would say take it peeta , it's a good way to see the country without the whole train thing , plus its good money and it would give you a chance to meet some new people who aren't hell bent on killing you"

"Yeah that's what I thought, I'll give it some thought, and I'll see you girls" then he walked out of the house

"Well that was interesting I suppose, do you think the rest of 12 will take to me as kindly as he did?"

"Maybe if you give that whole, in love with me speech every time"

"But it will lose its value if I have to repeat it"

"Suppose, hey I'm curious, what do they have for joining ceremonies in 2?

"well a couple with forge a weapon together , a blade , they will spend days together making it perfect for them , then they are cut with the blade , so that their blood may be joined forever on this weapon they made together, and as long as that blade stay in one piece , so will their joining"

"Sounds sweet…and deadly"

"Oh yeah? What do you in 12?"

"We have a toasting, where a newly married couple make their first fire together and toast a piece of bread"

"Seriously? That's it?"

"Yeah, we get normally about 5 announced a year"

"Can they be secret?"

"Yeah, nobody really has to know about them, while we get 5 announced; there are normally 7 or 8 unannounced as well"

"Are you ever going to do it?"

"Are you proposing that we do?"

"Not right now, but one day"

"Ok, do you want something to eat?" I walked off into the kitchen

Clove

"One day" whispered to myself

"Clove!"

"Coming!"

_One day…soon_

**Oh my god , this was so hard to write , sorry I've been away for a few days guys , been busy , just started y11 so it's a bit hectic , if I'm a bit spacey with my updates it's because I've become lost under a pile of homework , also guys , I'm having some real trouble with thinking of ideas for where this story can go ,so if you have an idea , let me know , alright , bye guys , review please thank s in advance!**


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